Goodbye is Hard, But That's Okay
To the son who leaves me in the morning:
You came to us so scared. Defenses up, you refused to call anyone by their names or eat anything other than pudding or Doritos. Your case. One of the hardest anyone had ever dealt with. Oh, you learned to not yell "shut up" or "cry baby". How to say "thank you". You learned my name, (I was "hey you big girl" for a few weeks). You learned how to dress yourself. How to not cower in fear at the sight of strangers. You learned that Jesus loves you, even more than all your “mommies”.
You learned how to put your shoes on the right feet, (well, 50% is good enough). You learned how to smile. How to share and how to be a big brother. You learned, so much. Even your ABCs and 123s even after I honestly had given up hope.
You, the lover of all rocks and acorns and scooters. You grew and changed so much in just 9 months. I hope you learn how much potential you have. How you don’t have to ever fear anyone except the Lord. I want you to learn to love others, truly love them even when it’s hard. Cause you know what? That’s what you and your family have taught me. Love. Yeah, I know what “love” is, but that’s the "convenient come easy" kinda love. I’m talking the love you learn when you feel helpless and frustrated and totally ill-equipped, like this mama, but you just.keep.trying.
Because love is a choice. I wanted to give up. Even tried to once or twice. Jesus took care of that. Now here you are. Leaving me, but leaving knowing you’re important and loved and that you are a mighty warrior and precious in His sight and even ours too.
So I’ll say goodbye in the morning, along with my heartbroken tiny army. You’ll walk into your new life with your sweet grandparents who are just so excited. We will cry, and pray and it will be hard. But that’s ok. Because the job is hard and it will never ever be done. We have work to do and if He loves us then we need to be that love to someone else. So we will keep fighting, and pushing back against the dark and the broken. Cause after all, that’s what you would do too. Godspeed sweet man, I’m really gonna miss you.
*This story was shared by a local foster mama. We're so thankful her family continues to say "yes" to helping children in need.*